With two other locations, Bay Ridge and Staten Island, you just KNOW this place is gonna be exquisite. Probably as good as Sea! Just ask Valerie De Lhomme:

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Heems, known best for being 1/3 of Das Racist, released a mixtape earlier this week entitled Nehru Jackets. It is jam-packed with his very specific brand of offbeat vocal rhythm, slow flow, political awareness, and cultural irreverence. One stand out track is not particularly political but it has enough irreverence to kill a water buffalo. “Jason Bourne” is a two-minute recap of the Bourne film trilogy set to a sample of the B-52’s “Rock Lobster.” I’m going to just rewrite that sentence so you can fathom how absurd it is: “Jason Bourne” is a two-minute recap of the Bourne film trilogy set to a sample of the B-52’s “Rock Lobster.” Listen below:

Cloud Nothings are releasing a new record in a  few days called Attack on Memory. It’s produced by hitmaker Steve Albini! And will come out on Carpark Records! Stream the whole thing below.

Cloud Nothings – Attack On Memory by Carpark Records

Loud and Quiet

It seems as if “Witch House” is becoming the “Chillwave” of 2012. This eerie genre of music is pretty broad if you think of it. From compressed vocals to digital downbeats, Witch House has some kind of dark allurement that is seducing every listener. This Saturday, our own New York witch duo,White Ring will be performing at Glasslands Gallery with oOoOO headlining and Sibian & Faun as the night’s opening band. As a cherry on top, F∆I†H will be spinning a DJ set. The evening is promised to be atmospherically dusky with bodies swaying to the pulses of “IxC999″ and everything else White Ring feeds. Tickets are still available so get on it before they are magically gone, click here.

This week we’ve got another special edition of TMBASTW!  On Friday, My Social List, the guys behind this column, are holding our first show at Shea Stadium in Bushwick. The show is headlined by Freewilliamsburg favorite Ava Luna and supported by Total Slacker, Caged Animals & Osekre and the Lucky Bastards.   In addition to the great bands, we are sponsoring an open PBR bar from 8:30-9:30.  The whole thing will only set you back $8.

Ava Luna, Total Slacker, Caged Animals & Osekre and the Lucky Bastards

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Unrest is getting a rerelease of their 1993 album, Perfect Teeth, which has been out of print for a minute. The reissue is being released on Teen-Beat by Teen-Beat/Unrest founder Mark Robinson, including a 7″ vinyl box set on six colored records and with 7 additional non-album tracks. The new edition will be identical to the original, but will be printed in metallic gold ink (real fancy.) Also included is a 7-inch-sized, 24-page booklet, with photographs from the Perfect Teeth sessions, taken by Mark Robinson himself. Shipments won’t go out until Spring 2012. Below is a favorite of mine, awesomely entitled “Make Out Club.”

I’ve spent years living in North Brooklyn but I really didn’t know anything about it until I was able to see how it was portrayed by 2 Broke Girls, a hackneyed, LA-filmed sitcom created by the “brain” behind Sex and the City and the “brain” behind Whitney. This column will keep track of all the knowledge dropped and questions answered, like: Why do hipsters wear knit hats? Because of Coldplay…of course (seriously, this was one of the first jokes of the series).

This week I learned…

Our Neighbors Are dead, crazy, pervs, or Polish

Coming from someone who lives in Greenpoint, like the two broke gals, the most flagrant flaw in its portrayal of my neighborhood is for the first half of the season, the amount of horses outnumbered the amount of Polish people. GP is not a completely gentrified neighborhood, where its Polishness comes up sporadically or half-ironically in the form of some hip bar that only serves vodka and homemade kielbasa. Currently, there are still more places that sell a plethora of smoked meats than ones that sell, well, really anything (Side note: Buy those meats!).

The episode starts with their neighbor dying, which doesn’t really affect them in the least. So they decide to meet their across the way neighbor but he is wearing a leash, which is true to life, just ask my neighbor Leashy Joe (If you are going to ask him, bring a treat, it’s the least you can do). Undeterred, they introduce themselves to their new neighbor who is POLISH. Played by Jennifer Coolidge—who was and will always be Stifler’s Mom—she is so bizarre that it’s hard to tell if the portrayal is even racist. The show uses her funhouse-mirror sexiness to make it seem like she’s a prostitute. But, guess what. No really, guess. Yep, she isn’t a prostitute but our gals think she is. Yada yada shenanigans ensue, the blonde broke-girl thinks she has herpes, and it all ends happily ever after with them sitting in a living room porch swing (just like where I write this very sentence, happily after).

[What I learned from last week's episode]

Last.Fm

Sleigh Bells are back with another teaser from their second LP, Reign Of Terror. This single is titled “Comeback Kid” and it is all we could possibly want from the banging duo. In this track, digital ringing is followed by noisy clashes of electric guitars to the maximum amp. Then, Alexis Krauss sets the song in sparks with her famous layering of incredible high notes. “Comeback Kid” is undeniably loud and playful. The music goes well with the artwork of flaming shrubs. If you forgot, Reign Of Terror will be released February, 21st via Mom + Pop.

Comeback Kid by Sleigh Bells

COS

Religious to Damn will be at St.Vitus in Brooklyn tonight. The show is a release party for their new single “Lovely Day”. Stream it below. Also on the bill are ITHI and Sondra Sun-Odeon. $8 gets you in. Doors are at 8:30pm.