Happy Mercury Retrograde Christmas. The planet of communication
and travel starts to retrograde mid-month, and wonít go
forward again until January. Wrap all of your presents by
December 17th. Get to the airport extra early. Donít accidentally
say stupid things to peopleís faces. Try to just think it
(March 20-April 19) You feel like a brand-new car. Mars
finally drags its daydreaming butt out of the pool mid-month
and goes back into your sign, all fiery and look-at-me.
Donít drive too fast yet, though. Thereís a trick stoplight
after you make that hard right, and a giant deer leaping
across the highway to your left. You wouldnít want to send
your new car straight to the shop, now would you.
(April 20-May 20) Suggested inner dialogue for Taureans
this month: Should I buy the new dishwasher with every luxury
amenity for my kitchen? Or should I buy the silk suit that
will make all of my co-workers intensely jealous of me and
probably advance my career? Either way, your ruling planet
is asking you to focus on status, stability, and lots of
(May 21-June 20) If you feel like not enough people
are on your wavelength for the first half of this month,
youíre right, but donít worry: you exit December in an exalted
trance-like state of communion with the world. I know itís
winter, but pick a sunny day. Drive to the beach. Sit there
on the sand. Watch the waves tumble in the sunlight, and
eat chocolate Santas.
(June21-July 21) You might feel like youíre playing
tennis underwater against two or more opponents, as the
month comes to an end. However, the first half of December
is dedicated to you getting a supercharge of buoyancy, energy
and confidence. So chances are youíre not even thinking
about losing at tennis. Youíve already assumed you will
(July 22-August 22) After the 16th, youíre going to
start on a new project. Maybe not right away, but soon enough.
Get on that bike and just go. As you gain momentum and feel
the wind whipping your hair around and you hear that whistling
in your ears, kindly yell at everyone to get out of the
way, lest you knock them all to the ground.
(August 23-September 22) Christmas and New Year parties
revolve around the good energy you bring to them. Somehow,
youíre the fun person to be around, which is so not the
stereotype. Youíre getting a nice side helping of love and
money and presents, and people actually appreciate hearing
stories about how beautifully your life is expanding.
(September 23-October 22) Your ruling planet is in the
sign of Capricorn, so this might be weird for you Ė instead
of making sure everyone you know has a Christmas gift of
equal value that is specifically picked out according to
their tastes and needs, you might find yourself drifting
off into pipe dreams about achieving stellar career status
for yourself. Itís okay. Go for it.
(October 23-November 21) This month youíll have a double-dose
of illumination, a stable shoulder to lean on, and probably
a lot of caffeine. You might alternate between being a wise
elder and a slippery shark. Youíre pretty determined right
now. Donít hurt your friends on the road to achieving your
(November 22-December 20) Like, whoa. On December 11th,
members of your tribe are advised against the following:
starting fires, fights, dominating others, or self-destructing
in any way. You are strongly encouraged to make some kind
of powerful transformation that will make a beautiful, lasting
impression, on your life and on the lives of those around
(December 21-January 19) Youíre disorganized. Your eloquence
has left you and put a flapping, stuttering noise in its
place. Your ambition has been replaced with self-reflection.
Donít worry, itíll only last a coupla weeks, and itís name
is Mercury Retrograde Ė yes, right in your sign. This is
a great time to re-do anything, whether itís re-writing,
re-thinking, re-financing, or re-decorating. The extra good
news is, youíre pretty hot this month. Everybody wants you.
(January 20-February 17) Capricorn tosses you the wedding
bouquet mid-month, and you catch it as if those flowers
were on a string being pulled directly toward you. Gemini
friends want to take you to the beach to eat candy. You
suddenly feel like learning to play a musical instrument,
or becoming a movie director. Do it all like itís no big
(February 18-March 19) Mars has finally left the building.
Now the planet of electricity and brilliance has entered,
and will hang around you for a long, long time. Take time
this month to get ready; youíre becoming more of a genius
than you ever were before, more of an earth-shaking presence
when you enter a room, more of a benevolent hurricane.
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