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FREEwilliamsburg Astrology
by Hop & Bynka


Happy Mercury Retrograde Christmas. The planet of communication and travel starts to retrograde mid-month, and wonít go forward again until January. Wrap all of your presents by December 17th. Get to the airport extra early. Donít accidentally say stupid things to peopleís faces. Try to just think it instead.

ARIES (March 20-April 19) You feel like a brand-new car. Mars finally drags its daydreaming butt out of the pool mid-month and goes back into your sign, all fiery and look-at-me. Donít drive too fast yet, though. Thereís a trick stoplight after you make that hard right, and a giant deer leaping across the highway to your left. You wouldnít want to send your new car straight to the shop, now would you.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Suggested inner dialogue for Taureans this month: Should I buy the new dishwasher with every luxury amenity for my kitchen? Or should I buy the silk suit that will make all of my co-workers intensely jealous of me and probably advance my career? Either way, your ruling planet is asking you to focus on status, stability, and lots of it.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) If you feel like not enough people are on your wavelength for the first half of this month, youíre right, but donít worry: you exit December in an exalted trance-like state of communion with the world. I know itís winter, but pick a sunny day. Drive to the beach. Sit there on the sand. Watch the waves tumble in the sunlight, and eat chocolate Santas.

CANCER (June21-July 21) You might feel like youíre playing tennis underwater against two or more opponents, as the month comes to an end. However, the first half of December is dedicated to you getting a supercharge of buoyancy, energy and confidence. So chances are youíre not even thinking about losing at tennis. Youíve already assumed you will win.

LEO (July 22-August 22) After the 16th, youíre going to start on a new project. Maybe not right away, but soon enough. Get on that bike and just go. As you gain momentum and feel the wind whipping your hair around and you hear that whistling in your ears, kindly yell at everyone to get out of the way, lest you knock them all to the ground.

VIRGO (August 23-September 22) Christmas and New Year parties revolve around the good energy you bring to them. Somehow, youíre the fun person to be around, which is so not the stereotype. Youíre getting a nice side helping of love and money and presents, and people actually appreciate hearing stories about how beautifully your life is expanding.

LIBRA (September 23-October 22) Your ruling planet is in the sign of Capricorn, so this might be weird for you Ė instead of making sure everyone you know has a Christmas gift of equal value that is specifically picked out according to their tastes and needs, you might find yourself drifting off into pipe dreams about achieving stellar career status for yourself. Itís okay. Go for it.

SCORPIO (October 23-November 21) This month youíll have a double-dose of illumination, a stable shoulder to lean on, and probably a lot of caffeine. You might alternate between being a wise elder and a slippery shark. Youíre pretty determined right now. Donít hurt your friends on the road to achieving your dreams.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 20) Like, whoa. On December 11th, members of your tribe are advised against the following: starting fires, fights, dominating others, or self-destructing in any way. You are strongly encouraged to make some kind of powerful transformation that will make a beautiful, lasting impression, on your life and on the lives of those around you.

CAPRICORN (December 21-January 19) Youíre disorganized. Your eloquence has left you and put a flapping, stuttering noise in its place. Your ambition has been replaced with self-reflection. Donít worry, itíll only last a coupla weeks, and itís name is Mercury Retrograde Ė yes, right in your sign. This is a great time to re-do anything, whether itís re-writing, re-thinking, re-financing, or re-decorating. The extra good news is, youíre pretty hot this month. Everybody wants you.

AQUARIUS (January 20-February 17) Capricorn tosses you the wedding bouquet mid-month, and you catch it as if those flowers were on a string being pulled directly toward you. Gemini friends want to take you to the beach to eat candy. You suddenly feel like learning to play a musical instrument, or becoming a movie director. Do it all like itís no big deal.

PISCES (February 18-March 19) Mars has finally left the building. Now the planet of electricity and brilliance has entered, and will hang around you for a long, long time. Take time this month to get ready; youíre becoming more of a genius than you ever were before, more of an earth-shaking presence when you enter a room, more of a benevolent hurricane.

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[email protected] | December 2003 | Issue 45
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