Sex in the Sub City
The Republicans are Coming!

cheap shot of the month

What the fuck is wrong with Ed Koch? Have you seen his face plastered across the city on signs for the republican convention, about to engage in some serious tongue action with an elephant? He's a democrat, right? So why the hell is he welcoming these turds into our city with open arms? Has he no shame? I mean, if it was Bloomberg, fine, or even Guliani, but Koch? I don't get it. It makes me mad to say the least. Not as mad, though, as the fact that from August 30th to September 2nd we are playing host to 50,00 rich, white assholes. We don't have enough security problems as it is, and now we have to deal with Bush and co. invading our city like some fatcat, fratboy circus.

But the worst of it is the date of the convention. Normally, they're held in late July or early August, but not this time. This time, in order to roughly coincide with 9/11, the republicans have pushed back their convention to further mine our nation's greatest tragedy. It's politics at its worst. It's shameless. It's wrong. Luckily, in addition to all the dicks flooding our streets, there will be folks of a very different sort: protesters. Thousands and thousands of them, from all around the world, will also be descending on New York, providing a nice balance to all the negative energy. For more information on all the protests, and to get involved yourself, go to www.counterconvention.com. There's plenty going on, and some of the events sound so great it makes me almost glad the republicans are coming. We're going to give them a welcome they'll never forget.

Meanwhile, several groups are doing their best to shed light on Bush's misguided policies, as well as registering people to vote and raising money for worthy political action committees. Moveon.org, the best of these, has even retained the great documentarian Errol Morris to shoot their next commercials. And instead of hiring actors, he's asking regular Joes to come forward and share their stories. If you or someone you know thinks you're a good candidate, go to www.moveonpac.org/morrissurvey.html to sign up.

Also making waves are two pro-Kerry organizations, Concerts for Kerry (concertsforkerry.org) and Downtown for Democracy (downtownfordemocracy.org). Both host parties and events with great bands and performers, with all the proceeds going to help defeat George Bush. Other groups include Bands Against Bush (bandsagainstbush.com), which was profiled on this website, and Punk Voter (punkvoter.org). Individual bands and artists making the rounds to help oust Bush include Jack Black, Grant-Lee Phillips, Ted Leo and the Pharmacists, and even my own humble band, Pretty Flowers (prettyflowers.org), which recently completed our own mini Lick Bush Tour.

So you see, things are happening, wheels are turning, events are being set in motion. If even the musicians are out there stumping, people who spend most of their time drinking, drugging, fucking and sleeping, there's hope for us all yet. Add to this Michael Moore's amazing Fahrenheit 9/11, which will do more for Kerry than millions of TV ads will, as well as the docs The Hunting of the President, about the right's incessant quest to bring down Clinton, and Outfoxed, about the blatant conservative bias on everyone's fave Fox News, along with the plethora of Bush-bashing books, and of course Air America, our own liberal station (1190 AM for those not aware), and we seem to have all bases covered.

All we have to do now is vote. That, and pray that our votes are actually counted. Before then, we at least have the convention to look forward to. My goal is to kick at least one republican a day. Yours can be the same, or more if you're itching for some real action. I've also registered to volunteer for the convention, several times actually, under fake names. Apparently, many others have also done so. Of the 10,000 people who've already volunteered, my guess is that a large portion of them are fictitious. To add yours to the list, go to www.2004nycgop.org/contents/volunteers.

And if you're really looking for some action, why not volunteer and actually show up? You can probably screw up a lot of shit if you put your mind to it. That's what I call being politically active. Ed Koch, go fuck yourself.

--Russ Josephs

E-mail: Filthstar@aol.com