FW: Everyone I play your "Thin Cities" EP to immediately falls in love with the music. Did you sell your souls to the devil?

ISAAC: If by "soul," you mean my young taut body, and by the "devil", you mean a 43 year old Hatian immigrant that works at Bennigan's, then the answer is I am too drunk to remember.

MARTIN: Umm, I'll let you know when this hellhound quits chewing
on my leg.

FW: We hear your latest material utilizes a real drummer instead
of retro-sounding drum machines. How does that affect your
sound?

MARTIN: On the new record, its a bit more organic sounding, and live, its about ten thousand times better sounding to have a real drummer as opposed to playing along with canned beats. but sometimes we do both at once.

ISAAC: On some songs Casey straps on the headphones and they have both crazy drum machine beats and crazy real drums. Casey listens to more genres of music than anyone I know and he can seriously out-class and out-freak the drum machine anytime. Best! Drummer! Ever!

FW: Every band gets influences hung on them, but lets do the opposite. Finish this sentence: "If you hate (insert bands here) you'll love The Secrets"

ISAAC: If you hate Arab On Radar and Joan of Arc, then you'll love The Secrets.

FW: Being in a band is much better than working a shitty job. What's the shittiest job you ever had?

ISAAC: I was a gas station attendant and I had to dust off the convenience store food every week.

MARTIN: I waited tables until very recently. the people I worked with were great but godDAMN, what a demeaning job. you basically go in as a volunteer and kiss ass in the remote hope you might leave with some money at the end of the night. I was pretty low in the waiter hierarchy at the restaurant and I'm not a cute girl so I didn't work good shifts or make lots in tips.

FW: Do The Secrets have a band van? If so, please describe.

ISAAC: No. Casey's car has lots of coffee cups littered about, though.

PAUL: Before we got real drums, we could fit all our equipment into my Chevy Lumina's trunk. That was cool. Now we have to take 2 cars to every show. Boo.

MARTIN: I don't know what those guys are talking about. our van is painted to look like B.A. Barracus' van in "The A-Team" and is packed with retired CIA Agents. No wait, that IS the A Team... they were retired CIA people right? I dunno...

FW: Who would be your dream cameo on your next record?

ISAAC: I want Miriah to sing a duet with me!

PAUL: Forget a duet, she should sing our whole record.

MARTIN: I want Bob Pollard to bring us beers and do his big rock kicks in the tracking room while we record in the studio. You might only hear his pant legs swishing against each other (especially if he was wearing cordurouys) but you'd hear the spirit in our playing... yeah...

FW: What's your biggest pop culture vice?

ISAAC: MTV2, MTVX, and VH1 classic. I can't get enough.

PAUL: Isaac makes me watch it and I hate him for it. But I love him for it. I am so torn.

MARTIN: fuckin' INCUBUS. I can't help it, that "into flames" song kicks ass.

FW: Is rock-stardom bringing in the booty?

ISAAC: If by booty you mean pirate treasure, then the answer is yes. We also solve mysteries...

MARTIN:..in our A-Team van.

FW: What are The Secrets upcoming projects?

ISAAC: I am going to remix Kid 606's remixes of J. LO when I get the sampler I won from ebay in the mail. Then I am going to sell them for cred! Also, The Secrets are releasing our fight song in 7" inch form in the coming months with some sort
of remix on the b-side. Our split single with DL Bucket (from Holland) on Dangerfive Records (from Vermont) is coming out Valentine's Day, 2002. Maybe within a year we will have a full length. I hope so.

We're also playing at LOCAL (in Williamsburg, 349 Kent Ave, corner of S. 5th st) on the 22nd of March.

MARTIN: yeah, what he said... we wanna tour too.

FW: Would you say your music comes from the heart, the soul, or the loins? Please explain.

MARTIN: it depends on how good we've been about tending to the needs of each. when one falls behind in maintenance, songs come out of it. figure it out from there...